Missed opportunity?

Maybe, maybe not. Taking a short laydown today knowing there's no way I'm fading out.

My dogs lounging along side, close to going out, just like clockwork. My mind's trying to fight off the thoughts but maybe I'm not really tired, possibly just bored. Four to five PM has always been tough for me. Too early to drink, too late to keep working, my twilight zone. Enough of that and on to the thoughts. I'm out on a production trip. We're shooting a job for Leo Burnett, but I'm on my own this evening and thus arrange to meet my good friends Tom and Marion Flanagan for a few cocktails and dinner at a Mexican restaurant in Santa Monica. The dinner kicks off fast with several Marguaritas at the get go and then vino and then dinner. We're revved up, not on drugs but soaring with evil liquid. I'm thinking, I gotta do it, I can not let the Flanagan's down. I pop out of my chair, shuffle between the tables, do a little move then do the patented spin move into a full drop down Gator, pop back up, a little more shuffle then down again, just for emphasis. If you did not see it the first time then maybe the second. The Flanagan's laughing, the Noble smiling, I sit down. A girl at the next table, eating with her parents, rushs over and says "I work with Steven Spielberg and would like your card" I have no cards on me so suggest she write her number on a piece of paper, in this case, my parking ticket. Slow forward to the next day, a bit hung over I remember the girl and hunt for the number. Guess what, I gave it to the parking attendant that night. What! I drove over to the restaurant at lunch, tickets gone, went downtown. Gone. Moral: what alcohol giveth, alcohol can taketh away.

Thinking about Willie

Not very successful today with the laydown. Just couldn't get that relaxed. Since it's so dry down here in the Fe, especially in winter, your skin just tinkles like you've taken a dose of niacin, like small pin pricks happening all over. Have to do some major creaming to fight that and I suppose us guys just don't take the time. Got to thinking about back in the day, sex of course, but if you have read some of the other pieces you know that's a popular laydown subject so you're not surprised. Of course one of the major concerns with men, especially young men, is popping the weasel too soon, sometimes way too soon. Not only is it embarrassing but not the studly way you want to be. A big ego crusher. Probably due to being way worked up, way too soon. When you're going down that highway it's hard to reverse, near impossible, a done dog deal. Now this is where Willie comes in, Willie Mays, the baseball great. So you're feeling that pre-mature weasel pop and you think "oh no". Immediately your mind changes from doing the deed to imagining Willie scaling the wall, making a terrific catch, firing the ball to third attempting to score a double play. If you've made it this far, it's on to Willie at bat ready to knock one out of the park, running the bases, crowd going wild. At least it was a plan.

Noble comes clean

Yeah, Noble in the Motor City on a sales/follow-up mission, 1998. Dinner and drinks with my man John, in a wheel chair being pushed by a dude, hired to do it. He got hit by a car at night in the downtown area a few weeks prior. Rehabilitation in the works. John, very well known in the downtown Detroitlet area. I was amazed at that. He should run for mayor, definitely win. We recently did a big Ford shoot in LA . After many drinks, John says

" Let's go to Tony and Tina's wedding". I'm thinking, why not. If he's in, then I'm in. The elevator opened and we were there. Wedding party in progress. The Noble scopes the scene, grazes the goodie table, possibly buys a beverage or two. Dance floor looks interesting, and you know the Nob, got to impress the crowd with the Infamous Dance Moves. Johnny Wad, Snapping Puscums, West Coast Turn-A-Round, Curly Strut followed by of course, the drop down Gator, done twice. Well, I was asked to leave, kicked out of Tony and Tina's. Four letter works flowing, back and forth as I headed to the elevator. Walked back to the hotel, reved-up. Weeks later I found out Tony n' Tina's was a play. I felt stupid. I know film but obviously not off-broadway. Advertised as "participate in the reception, dance" Bullshit, they should of paid me for the effort, I plused it, gave it edge, made it better, whether at the time I knew it or not. Actually proud of the moment in retrospect.

Dining with Di

No rest for the weary today. Hopefully my dogs with get a little shut-eye, as I lay there with eyes shut and mind just clipping along. Well folks I know you are not going to believe this, but yes, the Noble, your humble narrator has dined with Princess Diana. It was in a dream but I was there. Let's set the stage. I had been invited to join Charles and the boys for a tribute to the deceased Princess along with other important guests and friends. We started out on a walk down a street in London to the place where Diana had been buried for a memorial and supper compliments of Charles. It was a thrill walking stride for stride along the Prince and the boys. Well finally we arrived at the location and a big tent had been set up for the gathering with a large buffet supper on display. Charles thanked all his guests for coming and invited them to partake in the buffet. And with much pride he announced "I'm very happy to say we have possum on the menu tonight". Yikes, I think, "no way" and serve myself a plate of other treats. After I finish and am thinking about going for seconds I see Princess Di at the table having a bite. Is she real or a ghost? Not sure. Nonetheless I approach her, and in my biggest redneck Southern drawl, I say " I thank I'll git me some more of that thar possum" She cracks up and I then wake up, laughing with her.

Charisma

Eyes wide shut, but for some reason I'm revved up and unable to contemplate sleep. I feel very tired but seem unable to do anything about it. So here we go with the thoughts. The amount to which a person succeeds often boils down to the amount of charisma they possess. I think I may have had some back in the day, as in both Xerox Schools I was the MVP, although at that point I really did not know why. They saw something in me that I did not. Perhaps a spirit, a raw talent, possibly BS. It's something that you are born with and grows as you build confidence, but your self-esteem needs to stay intact. That's the key ingredient and it's becoming a rare commodity. I know I struggled with it early on. Doubting yourself can be a real roadblock I'm not painting myself as the guy who did it right, as a parent, because I sucked at times. I could become the kid instead of the parent, and often. So do not fuck it up bro. You will regret it down the road. I know I do. I think my mom may have made it difficult for me but for some reason I always had enough attitude and the ability to push through. Her insecurities were not mine. I have my own. Peace Mom and I love you.